I don't want to fight, I look at you and in my heart I know that's all our relationship is based on. I'm tired of feeling angry towards you then act like it never happened. I want a relationship, the kind that makes me smile instead of cry, one that gives me adventure, not chaos. I don't want an enemy what I want most is a best friend. Things were much easier before we met each other, I didn't stay up crying and you didn't drink to ignore the problems. I was strong and unique at least that's what you always told me. what happened, How did we get here? it is a Saturday night, in the olden days we would be sneaking out at midnight to meet each other by the swings, all we did was talk but it was enough, you were enough. I would swing back and forth while looking at the stars above me, listening to the crazy thing your cousin did. Now it's a Saturday night, but there are no midnight trips, no story about your cousin; there aren't even any stars. Now there is "space", or what you told me. I'm in my room wondering if you're out and if you are with who? I'm not a fool, I know we haven't been happy in a while. We are not the same love-struck teenagers that believed in a forever. We are not the newly engaged couples that couldn't wait for that forever. We are Husband and Wife, with that, it chains us. Chains us. I guess we were so used to being free we never really thought there would be chains. But there are and it would seem, I'm the only one still trying to pull the weight for both of us. I'm still trying to believe in that forever. It's Saturday night and you're not here, you called and said "I'm going to be home late, I have to finish up some work." then, you hanged up. I remember before it would be "Hey Honey, I'm gonna be five minutes late, wait up I have a surprise for you" Usually then you would bring me flowers and we would make up. but that night you didn't bring me Roses, you came home with the smell of perfume, women's perfume. The smell was all around me, in my bed, in my heart and when the morning came I turned around expecting to see that women sleeping in bed with your arms wrapped around her. But instead, I woke to an empty side. the smell is still there. I decided to confront you, and in my dream, I did just that. you told me you're sorry and that you love me, to forgive you, and do you want to know what I did then I took you in my arms and kissed you, I was kissing us back to life. but that was just the dream, what happened instead was I confronted you and you denied the smell, I never knew you were a liar. I told you I couldn't do this anymore...I could hear my heart crying out not to give up. but my heart wasn't right, and you told me you think the same. you walked out, took your stuff like our home was a motel 6. And then I was left in an empty house with an even emptier heart. How did we get here? How does anyone ever get here? I want to say I got better, but I felt like a flying plane with no destination, no home and no sense of adventure.

Thank you all for reading, if you want to know what happens next send me a message to let me know if you want more!