i lust for change
just as much
as i loathe it

i'm in a constant circle
of looking for something
else

but only realising
in retrospect
what 'else'
could have been
when it's too late

i live my future
in my past
and my present
in my future

imagining
but never making it
always just out of the grasp

running after something
i don't even know what it is
until it's got away

believing the next step
will bring what i'm looking for
only to keep looking back
once i've rounded the corner

beaten around
by the waves
of my own mind

longing for change
like ocean
but looking for land
while on a ship

i lust for life
just as much
as i loathe it