Do you remember the hollow nights? The times you felt like falling apart? How are you doing? It's been a while. Are you sleeping again? How's your mind?

I remember them hollow nights because I'm still living them. The nights I fall apart, I find myself far away from 'doing fine'. Why is the question I keep asking myself. Why do I keep coming back here, why can't I believe the words I write? And why can't I show how I feel?

I know there's thousands of people who feel the same cold, cold feelings that I feel. I know I'm not alone, but do I believe? Knowing and believing are far away from each other.

My mind is thinking a lot of thoughts, but I'm used to that. It's the moments my mind is quiet that scare me, a void darker than the blackest shirts I wear. My body is shivering, not knowing what it is supposed to do now. When will it leave? The anxiety, the sadness, the dark void, the pain, the tears. Will I ever feel alive again while looking at the sun?

aesthetic, alone, and alternative image quotes, tired, and sad image

Life is all about searching. Everybody is looking for love, a future, happiness or wealth. I'm looking too, I'm searching desperately for the happiness I'm pretending to feel. I'll fool myself by saying that my happiness is right in front of me, I just need to grab it. I'm still searching, but all I seem to find are question marks, but I can't find any answers.

The future. I'm not even going to start talking about that.

Words I write, sentences I speak, feelings I paint, fade away and become meaningless.
That's all I am right now, meaningless.