My speech for my best friends funeral.

Had to cut it short because i'll most likely be crying as soon as i say his name

"Scotty. I can't believe i'm up here today.
I've never lived without you and if i'm honest i'm finding it hard.
Dad showed me pictures of when i was born the other day and one was of you,a little goofy 2 year old boy kissing the forehead of a 16 hour old baby. I guess thats where our story began, that first kiss to my forehead sealed the deal you'd take on the role as my brother. God how you succeeded in that role.
Every time something went wrong you were always the first person i thought to go too. When i was sick and you realized i wasn't at the bus stop so you'd come straight to my house and get in bed with me.
We've been through some shit times.. there is no hiding that, when we lost Josh and Jake. There is no way i would have gotten through that without you.
I can't thank you enough and i have too many memories to share that if i start i'll never stop.
I'm so angry at you for leaving me, you'll never see Isaac grow...never see my kids or when i get married.
I got to see you graduate but you'll never see me do the same. You were meant to save lives not end yours. But i'll forgive you for that eventually, right now i'm just hurting and i need you but you aren't here.
It hurts to be in my house now because of all the memories, it took me a week to change my bedding just because it was yours and it had the faint smell of you. I have your rugby hoodie in the back of the wardrobe, thrown to the back where you put it last time you were round.... i haven't opened that wardrobe for fear of losing your scent. There are memories of you everywhere, school are doing a memorial for you next week. There are flowers for you everywhere in the village, a cluster by the pub, by our old nursery, primary school, my house, your house and even by the river where people used to see you kayaking. I wish you had known how much you were loved.
You were the best brother i could have asked for, even when we argued i always knew no love had been lost between us.
There are so many songs, books, movie,tv shows, etc. that i can't bare to see or listen to anymore because of the memory attached to it.
I hate that you gave up on living when you had the whole world to see, you eradicated the chance of your life getting better and that makes me saddest of all.
Maybe life isn't for everyone but i wish it had been for you.
Save me a seat and i'll meet you on the other side."