I want to burn every written word that was about him. Everything I’ve written and sighed over because writing about him was the most beautiful thing I could write about. I want to delete all of the thoughts about him from my head, because I’m ashamed of having once thought them. I want to give back every look I’ve given him, every word I’ve said about him, and every butterfly that's nervously fluttered around in my stomach. I want to scream I DON’T WANT YOU so loud that it echoes in his head and I want him to know that I mean it. I no longer want to feel helpless and exposed, alone and unloved, jealous and embarrassing. I want to forget these past months and act like I don’t even know his name. I want him to know that I don't feel anything for him. I want him to know, so that maybe, one day, I'll be convinced that I don't, too.