I've found no one to talk to or no one to release to... so I came here .. No one is gonna read this anyways but .. whatever.
I'm so sick..
I'm really sick and I don't know if I can do this anymore.
I'm sick of being traped in my room the whole day and crying telling myself that I'm stupid, I'm ugly, I'm dumb, I'm weak. I do nothing.. this the truth. I've found no 'friend'... just no one to talk to or a shoulder to cry on .. I hug my pillow and I cry till' I fall asleep... I cry and I think of what's gonna happen tomorrow..
I have to go somewhere... no maybe another time??
I can't .. I just can't talk with people.. Right now, while I'm writing this, tears are streaming fown my face.. I dealt with 2 panic attacks since this morning.. now it's almost 2 pm and I feel like I'm losing my mind. Becasue tomorrow I have to go somehere and I actually should have gone yesterday or today.. But I'm afarid... I'm so afarid of going out and talking to people and being in public .. Right now,,,, I can't stop thinking of the bad things that may happen...of the most awkward situations that I might face ... I just can't.Do. This .. I Can't...
I'm not expecting you or anyone to understand what I'm going through because no one's ever had .. But I'm just writing because I want at least someone who can hear this... telling me that i can handle depression and social anxiety and all of my fucked up mental health issues ... I wish someone would just hug me and tell le that's it's okay .. that i'll get over it someday .. that I can beat social anxiety ..that it's not ruining my life and that i can truly smile and be happy

i don't know.... if anyone ever read this
I'm sorry i had you reading this shit .. i know i just wasted your time .... but ... i don't know...

Have a great day at least...