What I'm going to say is really hard. It's hard cause it hurts, and cause I'm scared of people judgement. But it is also hard to keep it for myself. I've kept it for probably more than 10 years, and I guess the internet and its anonymity is offering me the possibility to let everything out.

When can you say that someone has been abused? This is what I don't know, this is the reason why I never talked about it. When is an act innocent and when does it cross the line? Someone told me that what matters is how it makes you feel. If you feel abused, then this is what's hapenning.

When I was little - I have no idea how old I was, I'd say I was between 5 and 10 - I've been abused. Or maybe the correct word is touched.
I used to go on holiday at my godmother's house. I enjoyed it. But something always made me uncomfortable. Her husband. He used to touch me, my "pussy". But I wouldn't say anything, cause I didn't know, maybe this is normal and it happens in every family? At least that's what I thought. Now, I don't think it was normal. Maybe you're going to think I'm making myself a victim. You can think so if you want. But then you really don't understand. Eventhough it was "just" touching, I didn't like it, I didn't want it, and as soon as someone is not consenting, then the line has been crossed.

It stopped cause my mom argued with my godmother, so I never went there again. And I felt relieved.

You know my secret now.