3AM
I can't sleep. My thoughts are running wild. My eyes burn like hell. Tears are running down my face as I stare at that small stain on the wall in my room. I wish I could stop crying. My eyes are so swollen I can't even see properly anymore. Oh god it hurts so bad. I never thought a heartbreak could be so horrible. It's not my first one. But it's the first one that makes me feel like I'm dying inside.
My stomach hurts. I want to vomit. I already tried it a few times but it didn't work.
How can one person make me feel so sick? What did you do to me? No, what in gods name did I do to you that I deserve to feel this horrible?
I change positions a hundred times. My head is still spinning and my eyes are burning.There's a big lump in my throat.
You're missing. There's too much space for me in this bed. I miss how you rolled over and wrapped your arms around me in the middle of the night because you were cold. I miss your sleepy cute smile when you woke up in the morning. I miss the gently "I love you" whenever you gave me a kiss. I miss being with you. I miss your touch and your voice, I miss how you eat, how you sleep. It's been so many secrets, so many tears, so many hours spent laughing, so many fights. And now everything is gone.
I have no idea how to get out of this. My friends don't understand what I'm going through. They never loved someone as much as I loved you. They don't wanna talk about it anymore. You're the only one able to save me. And I know you won't do it.
You're still missing.
