it's my birthday
I asked for you , when i blew out my 17th candle .
you said you'd be here , but where are you ?
my eyes can not meet yours , because if you were here
sure I would reconize them , I found shelter within before .
my heart claim to know the right path , and I tend to lend it my right ear even when my mind keeps telling me not to .
such a pity !
but God , I swear I could see it going far from this , so many times .
what happened ?
for so many nights I woke up to see myself swirling in cold sweat , I felt the warmth of your arms wrap around my weist but then I woke up ,
to find nothing but bittereness snoring next to me .
you promissed to keep me safe , you couldn't .
I now assure you that no one can save me but me !
it's okey , it's not like your fault .
I promissed you things either
but my promises couldn't break out of my mouth , they just stood there in the middle trying to decide what else to do
almost frozen ,
until the word goodbye moved very fast to leave them behind .
maybe , maybe , maybe ,..
maybe not .
I shouldn't have dreamt about this . I shouldn't have let this happen .
but it happened anyway ; for some reason .
and I would never regret this .
another time , I'm spending this very special night alone , just like my first day in this world .
it could be meant like this , perhaps this is how I'm supposed to be happy .
maybe all you'll ever be is the happy dream I keep having ,
the night and the day
maybe you're just a dream .
but one thing for sure ,
you are my 17th wish .
Written by A-S.k
-Journey to Home