My name is Mollie. I'm 17 years old, I live in the United Kingdom and I like to describe myself as a geek. I'm not the stereotypical geek who's a science and math genius. My geeky love is History. I am a self-proclaimed History Nerd. History is my calling. I want to take a degree in History, specializing in the Tudor period in England, at Oxford University. However, I am your stereotypical geek that gets bullied and picked on.

I have never been one to fit in. Frankly, I'd rather not be part of the popular group. At my old secondary school being popular means having drama, squabbles and being mouthy to your teachers. I hate drama, and I am not a mouthy person. If I get told off in class, I won't talk back, I'll just wait until I'm outside the class, find my friends and have them endure a long rant. My sister on the other hand always as to be in the circle, whilst I'll happily stay out the circle with a few close friends.

Now in primary school when I was about ten years old, I got bullied. Mum always told me it was because my classmates were jealous that I was clever. I don't know if she actually believed that or if she just said it to make me feel better. At school, my school books had "germs", anything I touched had "germs" and sitting next to me was a death sentence as you were likely to catch "Mollie germs." This never phased me. I've been told often I was a bright child and I loved to learn, from day one of school when I was four years old. I still loved going to school, despite the names and I just spent my break times in a corner of the playground playing pretend games alone. That was how I liked it. Bullying in my primary school allowed my imagination to soar and I have a very vivid imagination to this day, most likely because of this.

I had a strong belief that as kids got older, they'd grow up and wouldn't be so mean. How wrong I was. The names I got called when I was ten were nothing next to the names I got called at sixteen.

Until my final year of secondary school, I had a small group of friends. I got on well with most of the group and I was quite happy. However, as 2017 started, things went wrong. I started falling out with some of the group. They began to leave me out, talk about me behind my back and make me feel non-existent. Like I wasn't good enough for any of them. Then one day, out of nowhere they decided to start their fun game that was "Who can ruin Mollie first!". They all confronted me. Telling me what a bad person I was. One girl, the ringleader, even said "I'm being nice to you, I am giving you advice. If I wanted to be nasty I'd have you up against a wall." I got so overwhelmed by their rude accusations, their threats and all that I had a panic attack. I do not remember the panic attack that well, but the day after, my "friends" were claiming I'd faked the attack to get more attention. To play the victim.They then did something even more wicked. They turned my boyfriend against me. He dumped me and he and all my ex-friends began their campaign to bring me down.

For months I was bullied. I was called a "Fat slag." "Wh**e" "Flat chested flat ass pig." My ex would send me nasty text messages, threatening me. He started rumors that I slept with him when I did not and it was horrible. I was seen by everyone as some kind of slag. I started putting on weight, had no self-esteem and tried not to get taken over by suicidal thoughts. It wasn't easy. There were days when I didn't want to go to school. The girl who didn't let anyone get in the way of her passion to learn was gone.

I soon found myself reaching out to two girls, who like me were also outcasts. We were not worthy enough in the eyes of our fellow students to have friends or have a good time at school. We were so worthless that we had to be picked on. My first friend had some form of Autism. My second friend did not have much money. And I was the school slag. Despite finding new friends, the rumors still circulated and I felt paranoid that secretly, they didn't like me. That they talked about me behind my back and hated me too.

One time, things got so bad, I was walking home from school and saw a blue double decker coming down my road near my house. I actually considered running out in front of it. Maybe it would kill me and all the pain would just stop. I was too scared to do it, in case I failed. I thought if I failed, the names would just get worse.

Sometimes I forgot who I was. Where was the girl who loved to sing, who had a dream to go to Japan and travel the world? Where was the girl who actually liked her small boobs and didn't mind having a little booty? Where was the history loving Harry Potter superfan? Where had she gone? Was this me now? Was I to be unhappy and alone forever? Was I on course to hate myself forever?

Then my GCSEs happened. I decided a week beforehand to get some help. I went to see a doctor as I'd been putting on weight and I had low self-esteem. My doctor took some blood samples to make sure I was still healthy and told me to try and focus on my exams as they were more important than anything. My results came back and as my Mums number was the main contact number for my GP as I was always at school, I didn't find the results of my blood tests for another five weeks. I sat the exams, studied as hard as I could and tried to just ignore the bullies. It was very hard. My confidence was at zero, my stomach was bloated I was exhausted. I'd be awake for ten minutes in the morning then feel like I had not slept in days. After five weeks of being in and out the exam hall, with my head constantly in one of ten textbooks, I finally completed my GCSEs, with my English and Maths being the new, more difficult numbered grades instead of letters. I went to prom with my two only friends. I felt like a princess. My parents contacted a friend who works in a Bentley car store and drove my friend and I to prom. The kids saw the Bentley and went crazy until they saw who was in the car. Me and my outcast friends. My first friend who had some mental health problems, my second friend who's family do not have a lot of money and me. The school slag. That's when I realized that these people didn't matter to me. If anyone else was in the £200k car they would've gone wild. But since we were freaks we weren't seen as worthy enough to come to prom in a least to them anyway. Not to me. My friends and I had a wonderful time at Prom.

Since June 21st I have been out of school. Exams are over and I haven't heard from my bullies or my ex since. My weight gain was due to Coeliac Disease (a severe gluten allergy), not overeating. My Mum had kept that hidden from me, to save me from more stress which was a good idea. I now start A levels next week at a new school, far away from everyone where I used to be. I am nervous but excited. I was dragged into hell by my so called friends, but I walked out of hell and I survived. I got bruised, my self-esteem is still lower than it should be but I'm working on trying to love myself again. I know one day, I will get there. I will be confident, and happy again. The names the bullies called me will soon be memories. I consider myself lucky. I could've been thrown against walls, or beaten. Some people had it worse than me. My story is one of sadly many.

I'm Mollie. I'm 17, I live in the United Kingdom and I'm a geek. I am also a survivor.