what is memory ?
that doesn't matter !!
you know why?
because now our memories became a part of my life !!
or even my whole life...
*memories warm you up from the inside. but also tear you apart*
do you still remember like i do ?
you remember the sound of the rain and the smell of it?
you probably dont, but i cant blame you
after what happened in 1st December i cannot blame anyone but myself.
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now i started to wonder is it the person that i miss, or the memories associated with them?
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i wish those day could have lasted forever.
in my memory, it doesn't end. we just stay there, looking at each other, forever
but that is just dream
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and now my worst enemy is my memory
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it is hard to look all the pictures we ever took together, back when we were in love
but it is harder to listen to our favorite songs
and that song that always bring dark old memories
making love to our Ed Sheeran playlist
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on a rainy night just like this night when i was staring at your beautiful face while you were asleep, thinking of how lucky i am to have you in my life
but that didn't last
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remember when you told me that the way we met was not just a coincidence, it was like the universe wanted us to get to know each other- our love wasn't ordinary because you and i were supposed to change each other forever
and i guess we did change each other, but not for better
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we promised to never leave each other
but we lied
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i have always wanted to be that person you're scared to lose
but i forgot that i could lose my self
and now here i am lost
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i do not remember who i was and what i seem like, before i met you, all i knew fore sure- i was more glad to spend those moments i have had with you
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but here i am and i let go all of the memories but that is the problem isn't it?
feelings are not memories...
feelings stay behind long after memories have faded
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and now i understand those are not memories those are feelings
so i love you.
i could say it in a thousand ways, in a hundred different language and i could list all the things you say and do that to show that you love me and i could replay all my favorite memories of you over and over in my head until you've consumed every single thought i will ever have.
but in the simplest way possible, i will just say, i love you and i truly believe i always will.
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can we just love again ?
one more chance ?!
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some people make your laugh a little louder, your smile a little brighter, and your life a little better
and you
be that person
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i love you for first time
i love you for last time
- my angel
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hey thank u for reading i hope u enjoyed reading as much i enjoyed writing it and i meant every word!!

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