Maybe I fall into the category of the hopeless romantic, because in the end I always find my heart leading the way towards my future, being the piece that keeps me moving everyday. I see the world through that kind of scope. I look in the mirror and I hesitate about how would someone ever find my eyes. I see my actions as reflections of who would fall with me, who would be that kind of person. Most of all, I struggle to fall in love with myself. I think a lot about the past, sometimes I live in it too much. I thoroughly aspire to relive moments from a photograph. Letting go is difficult, disappointment becomes hard to overcome and feelings get in the way, everytime, of course. That's how I am. Feeling for me is living. Maybe I should act more, and feel less. Maybe I should forget more, and worry less. I observe in the greatest amount. Details are capital. Every candle flame burns a long, thoughtful look full of wishes, promises, claims, grievances. I question luck, fate and signs.

I am most passionate and overwhelmed when love comes and goes, questions and answers. Yes, there are plenty of other things in life, I could never forget about them. Being an unrequited lover or having a romantic soul doesn't mean that I'm selfish. I promise I try to be selfless. I die for doing things right. I am not much for football, but for him I did. Years later, images still appear in my dreams. Sad to say, those are just my memories, they are not shared anymore. When memories are forgotten, I will always recall, even if that means drowning in single sided affection. I know it's long gone and it might be okay, but I am not fine at all. There is never a Christmas without a visit from a past ghost. The way I miss people or moments is one of the realest and most powerful tendencies of mine. Yet so hazardous.

But what happens when a stare notices me as the most vulnerable being wishing to love and be loved? I may be overreacting, wishfully thinking, mindlessly dreaming and taking a non-realistic outlook, however I love it, it keeps me dreaming. I sing to Taylor Swift every autumn. I remember everything all too well. I seek magic in everything. I wish I could find everything I am looking for.

bookcase, books, and bookshelves image
I could only explain myself with details and emotions

(Credit to Taylor Swift)