Some people with a disorder say that they are like two people, "the real them" and "the disorder". I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which is the least known disorder. People have it all wrong, they think you clean up all the time, or wash your hands every five minutes, or count to a certain number to feel "safe". What is the safe that we are trying to get to? OCD is like having you're brain set on fire, every fear you every had is stuck and it keeps you from living you're god damn life. Your anxiety is eating you alive and there seems to be nothing to stop the feeling. Some thoughts feel like nails on a chalk board and you can't stop thing about it or else. Or else what? Exactly OCD plays tricks on you and makes you believe insane things. Yes therapists gives you coping skills to try to get out of the horrible moment. But there is this part of you that doesn't even want to try right? It feels like you're stuck like this. You want to kill yourself, maybe to punish others around you. Im recovering so I have no happy ending to tell you guys yet, but I assure you that I will survive this. This is hard to admit but there is not two sides of me... I am OCD and always will be.