I don't exactly know how to start this, but here I go anyway...

I realized something today. Something I never quite said or thought about like this before. And before you start, this isn't a poem or a story, it's an epiphany.

This is for the people who don't feel as confident as they try to be. (Wait... did that rhyme???)

My epiphany consisted of three things...

One. Finding out that I really wasn't ready for a relationship just yet.

I simply thought about the idea of having to manage ANOTHER person besides myself. Some people like the idea of a companion to share personal stuff with. Someone to listen to you and always be on your side.

Breaking News: That doesn't always have to be a boyfriend/girlfriend!

It can be your cat, dog, parrot or best friend! The one who you have no sexual feelings for.

Like I got enough problems with school starting up again. I can't handle a second person with uncontrollable emotions besides myself.

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Two. I'm not confident as I should be.

Firstly, I'm the first person in my group to stand up and act like I don't care about what others think of me. And tbh, I don't. I CAN and WILL do bad all by my damn self if I got to. But that's not what I'm talking about.

I'm talking about what I think of myself when 'everyone' is not around.

I want to be as confident as I can be in this life because it only lasts so long. I need to build myself to that level. I don't need a guy to do that for me, cause odds are he can't and will find someone else that is confident.

Now, I'm not saying your guy (if you currently have one) is going to leave you, if you don't have a certain level of confidence.

I'm saying that they can't provide that for you. No man/women can be confident enough for the both of you!

For the past, I wanna say like eleven weeks, I've been doing things to better myself as a individual. I have been going to the gym and trying to eat right (every so often eating right is a real struggle AF but I'm not giving up) to give myself a boost in the confidence department. Everyone should find their own way to boost themselves up.

Growing as an individual first rather than a couple isn't a bad thing sometimes.

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And Three. I am my biggest ride-or-die!

This is where I felt like a preacher on Sunday morning.

Like do you ever just wake up and look in the mirror, knowing you look rough AF. Who is there to say, 'Oh nah, this will not due! Get in the shower so we can fix this situation'? News Flash: That was you!

You got yourself together enough to walk out the door in the morning. If it wasn't for you, you'd stay in bed not knowing where your life would begin.

Who was there for during your ugly years? Who was there for you when you found out your crush liked someone else? Who was there when your friends were busy when just needed a moment to chat? THE ANSWER IS YOU.

You do a lot for you! So you need to buy you some jewelry, a cute outfit, new shoes, take you out on a date, pay for you to get your hair done and whatever the hell else you can come up with!

Treat yo self!

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Hell BUY YOURSELF SOME FLOWERS!

Appreciate you for just being you!

No person on earth is gonna pamper you like you do.

This article really isn't for everyone. Like you do you regardless.

But if, in some way, this helped you, that'll be enough for me.

signing off, @withlove_noelle

postcard me.