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There has never been a time in my life where I don’t remember wearing glasses. Of course, my Mum didn’t give birth to a glasses-wearing baby, but as far as I can recall, I’ve always had to wear glasses. In fact, to be specific, I started wearing glasses at the age of 2! So I might as well have been born wearing glasses.

Jesus Christ.

I’ve been basically blind for 16 years.

F**k.

Apparently, I had to wear those glasses with the loops that went around the back of my head just to stay on!

I’m currently conversing with my big sister about this whilst I write this blog post, so this is all news to me.

Anyway, in the UK, 69% of people wear glasses. 72% of women in the UK wear glasses and 66% of men also wear glasses. This includes having to wear glasses when watching TV, reading and driving etc.
I find that I have a daily struggle of some form due to my glasses, some of these problems may be relatable to other fellow glasses-wearers. If any of these problems sound familiar to you, then let me know which one!

• I find myself constantly having to push my glasses back up my nose after they’ve slipped down a bit. Now, I don’t know about any of you, but sometimes I feel a bit lazy and instead of using my hand like any other ‘normal’ individual might, I use the power of facial movements. In simple terms, I make the ugliest, most stupid face ever by scrunching my nose up to gradually push up my glasses. I highly recommend this method to people like myself; the lazy motherf**kers who can’t be bothered to do anything. I do, however, draw the line at using this method in public places. Just imagine the reaction you’d get if you started scrunching your face up like that whilst in a super posh restaurant.
• Secondly, -and this one kind of links to the previous problem- I always notice the smudges and scratches on my lens’. That seems normal enough, right? To find that your glass lens’ have been smudged? Well it would be normal if it weren’t for the fact that I try to avoid touching my lens’ as much as I can. Yet, they still get smudged. No matter how often I clean them, my glasses are always smudged. The worst part is, I don’t know how they get so dirty.
• I do find, however that my glasses will get smudged when people ask to wear them and take them off me before I can say anything. Or, I will give them permission to wear them and when they hand them back to me, I usually find that when I put them back on, my lens has a great big finger print in the middle. Let me tell you people, without the right type of material, sweaty fingerprints are a killer to get off. In fact, does anyone else find that certain materials make smudges even worse? For example, wool is my enemy when it comes to the removal of smudges on glasses because it just makes the smudge even smudg-ier.
• In addition to this, the comments made by people who try on your glasses never fail to baffle me. “Wow, you really do need glasses, don’t you Gemma?” Like congratulations on your diagnosis, you should totally consider a career within optometry! I mean seriously, people? An optician has already told me I have s**t eyesight so I have to wear glasses, plus I’ve been wearing glasses basically my whole life, and you feel the need to tell me that I do, in fact, “really need glasses”. Anyone who says that to me deserves a slow -and I mean really slow clap.
• Now, this point is basically the same as the last one, only, it’s a little more specific. All I’m going to say, is that I hate it when children try to take my glasses off or just sit and try to poke the lens. I will say no more otherwise I’ll get even more angry than I am right now.
• With this point I am going to make, I don’t know if it will apply to any other fellow glasses-wearers. But, I feel like people see that I wear glasses and -for some bizarre reason- immediately assume I am intelligent in some way. Now, I don’t know if this is true, but I have found that in my life, I have been asked to help with other peoples’ homework or I’ve actually been told that I look like I’m “really smart”. This stereotype, I think, has originated from movies and books alike. I don’t understand it though. Why does the stereotypical, American, high school nerd have to wear glasses in order to be smart? My lack of decent eyesight doesn’t make any smarter than anyone else. It’s this stereotype of nerds wearing glasses, which helped me to coin one of my many quotes in life: is it because I wear glasses?

Thank you so much if you took the time to read through this rant! If anyone feels like they can relate to any of the problems I have mentioned, then don’t hesitate to let me know! Just know that I have many more problems with wearing glasses, but as much as I enjoy a good rant, not everyone else does.