I'm the girl who always sad but never show this for society. I'm smiling. You think I'm just a teeanger who embeds the depression but fuck no.
I get up and go to school. Everything is okay. I talk with my friends, tell jokes, laugh. Everything is okay. Teachers yell at me for nothing. Everything is okay. I go home. Everything is okay. My sister sleeping in her bed as always and when she woke up tells me how tired is she. Everything is okay. I do my homework. Everything is okay. In the night mom comes home. She is always tired and nervous. Everything is okay. When I try to talk to her, She always tell me how useless I am, she think these are empty words and forget about tomorrow but no I'm not. Everything is okay. I go sleep. Everything is okay. I'm always happy. I love everybody. I love my mom who always working and She always has a new guy. I love my dad who is an alcoholic and hates me because I'm not the perfect kid. I love my sister who was always the most beautiful of all and the people love she because she is so talented and pretty. And here I'm am who fat, ugly, useless, basic. But I'm okay, I'm smiling.
I have a really good family. I had 6 stepfather. I had a sister who do nothing but everyone love she 'cause she is look alike my dad. She and my mom in my birthday go to my stepfather and leave me alone because he was sick. They say They come in an hour. They come home in the night :) I was alone, I cried but no one cares. My dad forgot my birthday 5 times. Maybe I'm too sensitive. But these things all hurts.I fat 'cause I eat my feelings not because I'm lazy. Now I can cry if somebody say bad for me. Too much has happened to me I will not write down everything.
Everybody think I'm okay. I'm not alright. Because I always smile íthis not means I'm not happy.
I can not say to people that I'm not alright because they think It's just self-pity. But It's not.