I used to feel happiness.
I used to feel freedom.
I used to feel that I was accepted.
I used to feel that I was okay.
I used to feel that I had friends.
I used to feel that I could do anything.
I used to feel that I was myself.
Now I feel sadness. I don't know what happiness is anymore.
Now I feel trapped. I don't know what freedom is anymore.
Now I feel judged. I don't know what being accepted is anymore.
Now I feel empty. I don't know what is feels like to be okay anymore.
Now I'm alone. I don't know what it is to have friends anymore.
Now I'm useless. I don't know how to do anything.
I don't feel myself. But what is that? Me?

What am I?

I can't be myself, and I don't want to pretend to be someone else.
I can't feel what I feel, but I don't want to pretend to feel nothing else.
I can't love. I can't be loved.

I'm being consumed more and more each day and I can't do nothing about it.I exist too much.

Maybe I should just accept that this is what I am meant to be: not myself.