You can't imagine how much I hate you and disrespect you for being such a coward! Always so good at talking shit like it would solve the whole situation, no act, no sign, not even a goddamn try!!!
I was hoping but... that day... That day I knew.
I knew you're just a fucked up pretentious little girl who just want attention and to never ever be alone, playing the innocent cute one to get what you want to finally throw it like the trash you are!
You talk big game but when it comes down to it you’re just a scared little girl.
But oh girl! I- Am-a-Woman, messy as much as my hair is, crazy like the ocean can get, free as the wind can be, burning with flames of desire and wildness and you just couldn't handle it!
I was fake with all those bitches but never with you.
I was mean to everyone but all my facial muscles smile unconsciously when I see You.
I gave you things I could never get back! My heart, my secrets, my deepest thoughts and all the love left in me...
and now I'm just a person with a big blue whole where it's too cold to live in, and impossible to fill.
So Thank you little coward " thing "
Thank you for the illusion of the perfect love, thank you for the fucked up childish games, thank you for the hurt, and finally thank you for the lesson.
The lesson that I deserve more and more than " a wow, ok goodnight " when I open up about my deepest hurt, the lesson that I deserve more and more than kisses, hugs, and words to show me love, that I deserve honesty, loyalty and pure magical love because I give that shit, and I should receive it back.
Still, I don't regret giving up people and things to be with you, I don't regret it AT-ALL.
In fact, it showed that there's no telling how far I can go for the person I love. So imagine for a little while, if this person is the right one, imagine if this person doesn’t take all of it for granted, because this is what you did... and you made me think that I'm not that special for doing things for you, while you were the not-special-one for underestimating my efforts and always craving for more from others...
I hope that one day you find what you keep looking for in the others, that you’ll never feel what you made me feel about myself. That one day you grow enough to know that dirty secrets and lies always find their way to came out.

And now, it is not about you anymore! It is about me, me breaking free, me healing the amazing parts of me you cut and growing them back, me cutting you out of my life like my long hair you always loved to play with, me not seeing the tiny good parts of you anymore and focusing on the big hurt shit you make me through.
It is the only way to do it
It is the only choice left
to forget
Completely, absolutely, utterly
about you.